It’s only human nature to want others to like and respect us, for who we are. To accomplish this, the first step is placing the focus back on them. This by making people feel better about themselves. This is a simple yet effective rule, when it comes to developing friendship and becoming liked.
The principle of this is straightforward. If you meet someone new and you leave a favourable impression, by making them feel good about themselves, then they’ll want to see you again.
They will find opportunities to seek you out, as they want that same good feeling.
But life and time moves on. That same feeling you shared will rarely emulate itself, as you the individual and the other person, are in a completely different mindset. We all look out for ourselves first.
So the next time you see the person again, that initial feeling of connection is usually different.
The reason being, what we instinctively do, is place our wants before the need of others. It’s the looking out for Number 1 protocol.
But if we do genuinely like someone and the feeling is mutual, and want to become friends, what both individuals will begin to do, is start catering to the others needs to grab their attention.
Looking For New Friends
When we’re in a business or a social setting, what our brain will instinctively do is scan the immediate people around us, and determine if they’re a friend or a foe.
There are some individuals we feel is a threat, and we avoid them. There are others who will immediately give us the friend vibe.
These senses are automatically detected by the “fight or flight” survival response.
If you meet someone for the first time and want to know them better, make sure you send the proper nonverbal “friendly” cues. What doing so signals, is you’re not a threat to them.
Genuinely Earning Respect In Business
When it comes to business settings, it’s usually about the bottom line, which is profit.
The lubricant that dictates how much profit you’ll make, depends on how sincere you are, and the respect you garner.
If you happen to command respect, then people will naturally be drawn towards you. They will intently listen to you when you talk, they will take action once you ask them to.
If you’re not commanding this respect, know they may be “silently” laughing at you, and not with you, as they deflect everything you say.
So contrary to what many believe, having a fancy flashy job title or that luxury car, will not automatically command respect. Respect is something you need to earn.
Just Get Real
People won’t respect you and will quickly snub you out, if you’re pretending to be someone you’re not.
Humans by nature, have the ability to detect someone who’s a fake or a fraud.
Once they have their “bull-crap” meter on, they may see you as an insecure untrustworthy or insignificant person.
People are magnetized towards those who are truly genuine, by they being transparent, and exactly who they appear to be.
So just be yourself. Being your true self is the core foundation, for earning respect from others.
Be Discrete At All Times
The workplace environment, is a myriad of petty gossip and office politics. This creates unneeded drama and twists on everyone’s work and personal lives, just to pass the time.
It’s an extremely easy trap to fall into, to gossip and play the silly pointless games.
Realize no one respects individuals who talks too much, or can’t keep a secret.
So gain the reputation of someone who can be trusted in confidence, by remaining discreet and neutral.
You’ll then become that person others will seek out in trust, if they need advice or a perspective, which gains you respect.
Take Interest In Others
Make sure you show genuine curiosity towards those you like, your friends, coworkers or employees, by intently listening to them and remembering what they say.
They’ll soon realize you’re interested in them, and you hear them. They will then begin disclosing to you what’s important to them.
They will give you their full confidence, and talk to you about their dreams, their fantasies, goals, as you are their ally.
This knowledge will give you the perspective on how to manage them better, or to do your own job better, while knowing how you can help them.
Be Knowledgeable And Unique
What people respect is expertise or experience, especially if it’s difficult to find.
Choose a niche in your business or industry, and then become an expert in that area or subject matter. Continue to learn more and become a specialist.
Become the “go to” person when it comes to that topic. When you become known as an “expert” on something, everyone will then depend on your knowledge when needed.
Helping Others In Need
What everyone respects are those who positively contributes for the greater good, by helping them and others out without being asked.
What many dislike, are egotistical narcissists who thinks only about themselves, and are ignorant.
So help out whenever you can, make it your prerogative to voluntarily help those in need, which draws plenty of respect.
What this requires, is making every project you do more of a service, for your family, coworkers, customers, and your employer or employees.
What serving others does, is reflects on your true value while building goodwill.
Set And Stand By Your Boundaries
Nobody will ever respect you, if you’re an easy pushover, so you need to set your boundaries and limits.
If you’re given a difficult task to do, then stand up and explain what you’re capable of accomplishing, and then commit to finishing it.
If someone takes advantage of you, or becomes dependent on your constant generosity or help, then become more assertive.
The more boundaries you set out and stand by them, the more respect you’ll earn from others.