The Need To Love Yourself First Before Loving Anyone Else

You become smitten meeting someone new, someone who can make a dent on the “matter” scale. The hope is this initial spark is mutual and can become potentially eternal love. But then, you’ve experienced this feeling of swoon before.

You wonder why it’s so difficult to keep these juices flowing long term, when it comes to keeping and sustaining an everlasting relationship.

Why does that mercurial rise of the “love” chemicals, which initially existed in the relationship, suddenly fade away and comes to a standstill.

It appears inevitable any love affair after the initial meet and greet, that preliminary giggles and gushing, predictably turns into doom and gloom, devastating boredom.

What can be worse is the current relationship you’re in, initially felt like love at first sight, ends up with daggers thrown at one another, to the point of self destruction.

Experiencing real genuine love, should be constructive, supportive, and positively grow.

The key becomes to love yourself first. To love your dreams, love your mission, and be mindful about it.

Then eventually, that wonderful person to fulfill your soul will magically appear, and love you back equally if not more.

The Lifespan Of Everything

Everything that’s living has a certain lifespan, it has a cycle. During the springtime, say there’s a viral red juicy plum that blossoms. It eventually grows fully ripe, and becomes ready to be picked.

As is life, what it eventually transforms itself into is a wrinkled dried-up prune, as it lives out its lifespan.

It has taken its course, the freshness and vitality completely sapped out of it.

Its life has completely evaporated, while the exterior skin is still there, wrinkled, buy its innards are completely depleted.

All it’s youthful vitality, the pleasure, the fun, the love is gone. What just remains is vinegar.

The Beginning Of Any Relationship

Similarly, at the beginning of any relationship, the juices flow and rejuvenates much like that plum. It spreads virally throughout the body.

Every cell is electrified by the attention and the interest, of meeting that someone new. You blossom, your body becomes ripe with all the focus placed on you.

This is the ultimate form of human energy, and this energy is what makes you vibrant. This makes every fibre in your body tingle.

Ad

The Lifespan Of Love

The relationship however has a limited lifespan, because the energy is generated by the other person, while you generate very little.

You need to find where the flaw is. Is this feeling of being in love just infatuation, that’s providing the energy.

What you need to do instead, is self generate your own internal feminine or masculine energy yourself.

You need this balance to make yourself complete, so the love you feel is genuine and sustainable.

An Energy Crisis

You depend too much on the energy provided by that other person. You feel the need to possess them, you want them to possess you, to fuel your daily energy needs.

When you’re not able to balance and establish your own energy, you then feel the need to control that other person, to get the energy you can’t generate yourself.

This can however become tragic, because what you need, is to control that person at all times.

Then one day, they might just give up on you, and begin directing their energy towards someone else, depriving you.

You wonder what will I do now? You’ll most likely begin to shrivel, while you become desperate to stay in control.

The definition of “control” in this case, is attempting to possess what’s not yours. It becomes a process, to reducing that other person to become an object.

You no longer see them as human, but a tool, something that needs to be manipulated as you hunger for their energy.

Stop Being A Control Freak

Ultimately, you know you can’t or shouldn’t control another human, while thinking you can, which robs you of your peace of mind. You become subjected to anxiety, which turns into fear and anger.

Every time you feel you’re losing control, your anger elevates, as you throw a tantrum, in the attempts to gain back that control.

No relationship can withstand this type of pressure, so it will eventually collapse. Then you end up alone, again.

Play The Staying Game

What then happens, is you repeat this cycle all over again with someone new that you just met. So how do you stop this sad merry go round, and create a love that lasts.

Begin by concentrating on yourself first, become self-sustainable rather than feeding off someone else.

Make sure you focus on what your mission on this earth is, on what’s most important to you. Once doing so, you’ll be fulfilled with self generating energy.

Know And Love Yourself First

You need to find out how to become a completely sustainable lovable person first, all by yourself. Find what your purpose in life is, what your passions are, and focus on them at all times.

Set attainable goals for yourself, don’t stray, while doing everything you can to reach them. Stick to your dreams, spend time alone, before meeting someone new again.

Make sure you remain that person at all times, become that person instead of vamping on to someone else.

Keep your dreams alive, be loyal to that relationship with yourself, never give what you don’t have.

If you can’t be loyal to yourself, how can you be loyal to someone else. If you lose yourself, you’ll lose the relationship again.

Someone who really loves you, will love you back even more if you’re true to yourself first. If you truly love yourself.

Once someone doesn’t love you because you follow your dreams, then they’re not worthy of being loved by you.

If someone gets angry because you want to chase your dreams, then they’re not being supportive.

If they become jealous because you have success and they don’t, then that’s their problem.

Always Be True To Yourself

Never blindly lose yourself in the arms of another, for their benefit. Always believe in yourself, and the love will come and last forever.

Focus on the reasons why you’re here, by making it a first priority mission in life. Then you’ll be loved, for who you are.

Love your dreams, your life, and then that “soulmate” will appear, and will love you back.

Once you generate your own energy by loving yourself, you’ll then attract the true love who’s not currently in your life.