Our instincts as human beings is that we’re social animals. That we’re able to thrive, to survive as a species for the most part, because we’re able to connect, help, and work together for each other, this in order to solve most of our issues and common problems.
What this working together often means is compromise. Our social life becomes a tactical process. What we need to do is assert our needs along with our personal desires, while also needing to be sensitive to all of the preferences along with the motives of others.
This includes the cultural and social situations that we find ourselves in. What this can mean is that we don’t get the opportunity to be able to express ourselves, our true identity. What we do is wear a variety of masks, different hats to suit the situation, play different roles which fits the scenario.
But deep inside, what’s dormant inside us is that we crave to find our true authentic self, the individual who we think we truly are. The biggest problem becomes how we can express this, since our identities are often buried because of the daily struggles that we’re faced with.
To Find Ourselves
For many, “to find ourselves,” this may sound like some mumble jumble New Age hippie based quest. And yes, this may perhaps be where this type of thinking may of originated from.
There’s scientific proof however, which supports that we should be adopting this type of thinking seriously, as knowing and then understanding our true authentic self can prove to be vital for our well-being.
But what we first need to do is fulfill our social obligations, our duties, however strenuous that they may be, along with fulfilling our need to get along with others.
That we need to support ourselves and our families first, to pay our bills, to be good citizens, to make sure that our core economic needs are met, including our health.
What we also need to do is make sure that we take some time out for ourselves, to reflect, to reserve some time to realize our true selves, to find out who we are.
Find Out Who We Are
There are studies which suggests that once we as individuals engage in certain behaviors because we value or enjoy doing them, it gives us a higher sense of well-being.
But once we begin to feel that our behaviors are motivated or forced, decided by external forces such as money or social pressures, then our feelings of well-being begins to suffer.
We are also more than likely to successfully complete our goals which feeds our true self. So it becomes important that we set goals which reflects our true self more, this in addition to all of the goals which we pursue for practical reasons, such as obligations like paying our bills.
Realizing Our True Self
Our true self also has implications on how meaningful that we perceive our lives. There are studies which supports that those who understand or know who they truly are, are more satisfied.
That their behaviors which expresses what their true authentic self is, are more hopeful about the future, this rather than those who don’t feel that they act or understand in accordance with their true self.
Similarly, there are those who feel that they’re living authentically, that they behave based on how they perceive what their true identity is, will treat life as being more meaningful, than those who don’t feel they’re living authentically at all.
How To Find Your True Identity
What we need to do is live as “real” as possible on a daily basis. What the experts claim is that you’ll need to identify the goals that you really want to pursue, this based on you enjoy doing them. These are the types of goals which reflects your true self.
The goals that you’re required to do, such as earning enough money, pleasing others, avoiding guilt, reaching a certain level of social status, aren’t goals which fulfills your true identity.
What the majority of us has is a variety of these secondary goals, although some of them can reflect multiple motives. What becomes important is to identify those personal goals which reflects your true passions.
Find Your True Self First
What needs to be done first is finding your true self, which requires dedicated self-reflection, along with a willingness to be completely honest with yourself. What are the characteristics which defines you.
What are your core strengths mentally, and, what’s just as important, what are your weaknesses. Also realize that finding your true authentic self isn’t simply just an exercise in self-affirmation.
Instead, what it involves is a willingness to be able to identify and then accept your limitations, and then recognizing and ridding of your less then desirable traits.
What this can mean is the willingness to accept critical feedback, this from others openly as advice, and not defensively going into a pout. The idea and exercise of this is self-honesty and discovery.
You Owe It To Yourself
Who are you, do you know what your true destiny is, the identity of your life, or do you just fulfill what just needs to be done. There’s strong evidence which supports that it’s important you find and know your true self.
What’s now being understood is that it’s extremely important that people need to feel that their lives are fulfilled, meaningful. Living an authentic life is proving to be a key component when it comes to our mental health, so just get and be real.