We’re all gladiators when it comes to this arena called life. We go to sleep and wake up in a social environment where there’s no escape, but constant judgement and criticism. There’s challenge upon challenge which confronts us, where the walls of doubt and glory restraints us.
There’s constant mobs of spectators, naysayers, who’ll mock, sneer, or cheer us on. What each and every day does is brings new battles, this regardless if we’re ready for them or not, whether we’re up to face the task. The forces of life places us in one skirmish after another, making us feel completely overwhelmed.
So it’s up to us to choose the type of gladiator that we want to be, a victor or a victim. What becoming a victim in this social angst, translates into having relationships which are bad, one after another. The majority are victims of their own perceptions.
Development Of Self
The reason being, that most don’t bother listening to then developing their own unique authentic self. Instead, they allow their inner critics to rattle around in their heads, telling them how to fight their battles, what they can or can’t do. They’ll encourage and then discourage.
These inner critics are based on past behavior, or by the behavior of others. Your aunt says, “Sandy, I hope you marry someone rich, because you’re pretty but not that smart.” Or a friend says, “Your back must hurt because you have no spine.”
The Influence Of Others
Most will accept the judgment from their inner critics, and they invariably become true. So there needs to be a turning point, where one wonders how they can break away from this.
Once you identify these inner critics, then you can move beyond being a victim and assume the role of being a winner. Then you can become proactive and begin to positively influence every aspect of your life.
First Define What Ails You
Ask yourself what your problems are. Am I always jealous, constantly troubled by what others have that I don’t. Am I constantly angry all the time. Am I always sad and moody, or anxiety ridden.
What it takes is courage to take personal inventory of yourself. You’ll never get better unless you know what ails you.
Knowing Their Effects
Realize how your problems are affecting your life. Am I a poor parent and distant partner, a friendless dork, a spiteful backstabber, a drunk.
Am I someone who’s less than I could be, not reaching my potential. What this requires is complete honesty, as the truth will set you free.
Finding The Source
Ask yourself where these problems are stemming from. Who are my real and my mental critics. What does my inner critics look like, say, or do.
Exactly who or what’s keeping me from taking control of my life. This could be one of the most incredible transformations of your life. Look into the abyss and then see who’s looking back.
Identify What Your Role Is
Ask how you’re contributing to your problems, what’s your responsibility in all this. Are you deciding to be an absorbing sponge, do you beat yourself up attempting to constantly please others. Do you expect things from yourself that are unreasonable.
Do you treat yourself as a friend or an enemy. Do you allow your foes to drive you to distraction, anger, or anxiety. Recognize your role in your own problems, which is a step towards knowing yourself while gaining personal command.
State Your Desires
Ask what you specifically want to do about your problems. Do you want to continue to be a doormat, or do you want to rule your inner critics. Do you want to stand up to those who puts you down.
Do you want to take command of everything in your life. If you don’t list your hurts in order of their importance, you’ll remain being a victim. Once you do, you’re on your way to becoming a winner.
Know Your Options
Ask yourself what your options are, and in what order they should be placed. What should you concentrate on first.
Recognize what these issues are, and then know the choices you have. If you’re a workaholic and you’re wanting to spend more time with your spouse and kids, then do it.
There’s no one who’s ever been on their deathbed who’s said, “If I could live my life over again, I would work more and spend less time with the people I love.”
Choices are involved, this by weighing your options and alternatives, and then making the ones you want. Then you’re taking total command of your life.
Ask yourself how you should be dealing with your real and inner critics. Should you collapse in a heap of sorrow, when everything’s all gloom and doom.
How can you begin to take charge of every facet of your life. There’s no magical formula involved, although you might think there is. Unlike a vanquished gladiator who falls at the mercy of critics, decide your own course instead.
Mastering Your Relationships
What you can do is further strengthen your relationships, this with yourself and your perceptions. Decide how you take command of developing your own identification and self-worth.
What you’re doing is working on the only person in the entire world that you can help, and that’s you. Any improvement that you make in yourself, you can’t help but enrich your relationship with others, and the world around you.
What you can do is follow the progression of your life, this to jump start your relationships while taking control of your life. Then what you’ll become amazed at is how significant making a few adjustments in perception can be.