Every spring, your pulse begins to quicken. The flowers begin to bloom, you see May weddings in the park, but here you are, you’re single and lonely. Your fear is facing another summer of discontent, beach parties you tag along with your married or attached friends, expecting fate to disappoint you again.
So you think maybe it’s time that you started dating again. You could be just looking for a June to September fling, or something more permanent. What’s difficult is “breaking the ice,” as it feels more like a thick slab of concrete.
First dates are always usually a terror. There are however certain social skills, protocol, that you can easily implement, which will get you through this torture chamber of the meet and greet, and may even work out. Most however are out of practice when it comes to this collision.
You’ve been buried in your work, your laptop and your lapdog has been your best friend, all while advancing your personal life skills. You’re only social contact is on Facebook. You’re most common request lately when going out has been a table for one.
If that’s you, then you can use your tech savvy to your advantage when meeting and interacting with potential new partners.
You will eventually be forced into a real life person to person meeting, or mingling, and you may feel out of touch, awkward, this since you’re an absolute technology geek recluse. So here’s how to survive in the new tech age.
Facetime That’s Not Social Media
At times, we forget that it’s our face, our smile, that projects the most effective emotion from our bodies. So how we look along with what we say has the biggest impact, or it can create the most damage.
So when you’re sitting there sipping your latte in a social setting, you then spot someone that appears intriguing, and even if it’s for the very first time, make sure that make eye contact.
Allow the glance to momentarily linger a split second to establish that you’re interested. Another method is to catch someone’s eye, then quickly turn away, and then look back again, holding their gaze again while offering some type of acknowledgement such as a quick nod.
If you’re wanting to be bolder, then stroll past someone and catch their eye, then do so again on the way back. This has known to be effective at parties at or bars, where there’s a reason and excuse to move around.
Doing The Geek Speak
What everyone now lives in is a digital world. So use that to your advantage, this especially since you’re most likely already comfortable interacting online, this by using text or email.
For instance, if you’ve just exchanged phone numbers and wondering what to do, you can just send a text letting them know how much fun you had. To be more savvy, you can mention something funny that they said which stood out.
Sending your target an appropriate “selfie” can also be effective, provided that it’s decent. You’re both most likely on social media, so you can flirt there as well. Just keep in mind that Facebook is a public forum so messaging might be the best route.
The advantage of tech flirting among geeks, is that it’s accessible wherever you are, while it won’t usually intrude on yours or their busy schedule. Just remember that the odds of survival for any long-term relationship however relies on personal face to face interactions, and not digital.
Remain Realistic
Keep in mind that this process should be fun and not painful. If it’s too awkward, then that person might not be the right fit for you. If that’s the case, then be willing to cut loose, move on while you’re not feeling rejected or inadequate. Just look for someone else instead, and then try again.
This is more of a feel out process, a numbers game, and not a permanent engagement. Just because you’re interested doesn’t mean that it’s mutual. So just swing for the fences.
The best case scenario is that you meet someone and you both think it can work, that your imperfections are manageable. The worst case scenario is that you’re not compatible in the long run, but you’ll never know until you try.
Click Or Delete
Is also found that if you don’t feel an immediate spark, then stick it out for a while, such as a few dates or coffee. Most aren’t their true self, at their best right off the bat, as we put up our shields because of nerves, or a lack of practice or confidence.
It doesn’t mean that it’s a lost cause, it means that things always don’t go as planned. Conversely, there are times when you chat with someone for thirty minutes without pausing, and wonder where the time went.
Other times, you get so bored that your head begins to dull, while you frantically hold your breath afraid that you’re going to yawn. In these cases, just politely excuse yourself and move quickly in the other direction.
Don’t wait for others to start everything. If you see someone of interest, then lead, find out if there’s any chemistry. Let that person know that you’re somewhat intrigued.
Smile, be bold and say, “Hello, am I who you’re looking for?” The majority of singles are paralyzed by the fear of being rejected, and there are numerous relationships which never gets off the ground because of it.
So if you’re wanting to meet someone new, then leave your fright and ego at the door and just go for it, as it might just work out.