We’ve all been there, asked someone for something with abated breath. A job, a date, a raise, or money. We ask for forgiveness, love, a recommendation, only to be rejected. We start a business, we can’t get enough clients, we feel rejected. Then we become devastated, the feeling of failure.
What rejection does is exposes feelings, which gives doubt about our self-worth, which raises questions about our value as human beings.
That latest rejection, makes all our other accomplishments pale in comparison. We arbitrarily give rejection tremendous power, more than our own judgement of ourselves.
What lies inherent is not only our sense of self-esteem, self-love, and acceptance, along with our self-confidence being shot down. Our personal security becomes violated.
To Be Turned Down
Then our usual strong sense of inner belief in ourselves of being worthy, deteriorates. What being rejected does is causes a ripple, shaking our core foundation.
If our sense of inner security becomes weakened, as it depends on validation from others. The slightest rejection can prove to be overwhelming.
Similar to an internal lightening storm and its devastating annihilating power, it robs us of initiative and becoming proactive.
Success After Rejection and Failure
The insidious power of rejection can paralyze us, as we feel the fear of failure.
This failure is implicit on rejection, for those who identifies their inner security and self-worth based on external approbation and acceptance.
Yet, there are numerous occasions, instances where experiencing rejection was the stepping stone, for the most successful individuals among us.
To overcome a simple “no” triggered them to try again. To take a different approach on the same idea.
What it didn’t do was discourage them to quit, when they were told they would never succeed.
What they had instead, was the fortitude to refine and improve their ideas, to try and try again.
Preventive Measures
So what we need is to be aware of the power that is rejection, then brace ourselves by taking preventive measures.
We need to be ready once we face it, once it strikes when we’re least expecting it, that it doesn’t rock our foundation, and lose rhythm from our lives.
It’s also clear no one is completely impervious to rejection, and no one can totally ignore it.
Learning From Rejection
On occasion, what rejection can reveal are the steps which needs to be taken, to improve on something that’s not providing the desired results.
An author for instance, will usually be faced with numerous rejections from publishers, and may even consider some of their suggestions, for improving the essay.
An actor who’s constantly rejected for numerous auditions, may eventually consider taking additional acting classes, while not realizing they may just not be suitable for the occupation.
A politician who’s constantly rejected from taking a stand, may decide to adopt a different polar opinion.
What Rejection Can Do Is Improve You
At times, what rejection can do is force you to try and improve, or attempt a different approach.
The fact remains, the value and the worth for you the individual, isn’t really much different from attempting to better yourself, or your activity.
This is what some who has a negligible sense of inner security or suffers for low esteem, fails to see.
As a result, it often behooves them to work on building up and expanding on this sense of inner security.
On Track For Quicker Inner Growth
What everyone needs is to be wary of rejection in their life. This entails being self-aware and more mindful on a daily basis, to prepare for negative consequences.
So each and every day, being aware of your mindset needs to be tracked, as it may be compromised at any moment.
This includes what you tell yourself, how you plan to react to different situations. Knowing what your feelings are about the events that occur.
To get a better grasp on what goes on inside of you for most situations.
To become more conscious of everything however, what it takes discipline and time to comprehend.
You can then get a sense of where your inner security needs to be, where it needs tweaking.
Recognition Of Patterns
What you need is to see a pattern developing in your self-talk, your reactions, your emotions, and your feelings.
Also make sure you take into account what your physical reactions are, during these times.
Recognize if your breathing suddenly becomes more shallow and quickened, or your solar plexus begins to twist in pain.
What perhaps develops is a lump in your throat, as your blood pressure elevates.
Always become consciously aware, not only to the pattern of your thoughts, but how your body physically reacts.
To Regulate Emotions
Your mindset most likely situates on issues such as you making a lot of mistakes, and then you dwell on them.
That you’re supposed to be perfect, how incompetent you are, or how you can never get things right.
You need to realize you’ll always be rejected, such as certain people will never like you because of how you look or talk.
So get used to the feelings produced by being rejected. What seeing a pattern does is helps you to counteract and hopefully correct it.
You Will Never By Perfect
On those occasions you catch yourself reacting and establishing to what’s going on, you’re able to bring conscious awareness to it. This rather than reacting to the situation itself.
This way, you’ll be able to turn the thought, the reaction into something more positive, more self-affirming. Something that works together with your sense of security.
Once you begin this process, then observe how you begin to feel and act differently, once you face another rejection.
What this contributes to is another step towards the personal freedom and entitlement, you’re seeking and deserve.