They are an absolute legend in their own minds, the world revolves and is thus reflected by their image. They’ll corner or even stalk you at a party, they will then replay their grand life story by recounting their saga to you like a broken record. Some narcissists are not very likable and fragrantly egotistical.
The majority are sociopaths who can actually be charming while displaying intelligence as they preach to you about they knowing a little something about everything. They may even at times care about others while showing compassion and empathy, until their “god” like status in their minds is questioned, challenged or threatened. Is this the story of your life? Sound familiar, remind you of anyone?
Once you stop stroking their big ego or you dare to disagree with their endless rants, they can then turn on you and then become aggressive or punishing. But once you realize this pattern, a narcissist will calm down like a sleeping puppy.
These people can occasionally pose danger since they just care about themselves, while having a limited and empty capacity for giving unconditional love. Sadly, the true emotions in their hearts haven’t either developed or have been ignored due to a variety of psychological traumas, both from emotional or spiritual handicaps.
As difficult as it may be to comprehend, they have very little insight into their own actions, nor do they even care or regret them. As they are often highly intelligent and can be intuitive, usually establishing great careers, they mainly rely on their intuition for self-interest or manipulation.
Finding out if you’re dealing with one, married to one, or in a relationship with one, ask yourself the following, and be bluntly honest, is he or she the following.
Signs Of A Narcissist
• Does that person act and think that life revolves completely around them?
• Do you have to compliment them in some way to get his or her approval or attention?
• Do they constantly steer the conversation of any topic back to themselves?
• Do they downplay or diminish your feelings or your interests?
• If you disagree in any way, do they get upset, become cold or be withholding?
If you’ve answer “yes” to just one or a couple of these questions, then it’s more than likely that you’re dealing with a narcissist, but you’ve already most likely know that already, right? Responding to a “yes” to three or more of the questions suggests that your emotional freedom may be violated.
Narcissists are extremely hard nuts to crack, as they craft their personality on traits of a sociopath. The best that you can possibly do is attempt to align with all their positive aspects, and then try to focus on their behaviors which aren’t working.
Even if one knows and are wanting to change, progress may be limited, realizing meager gains. So the first basic rules is not to connect with a narcissist, or even dare to entertain the illusion that they’re capable of the “giving and taking” that’s necessary in an intimate relationship.
These relationships, you’ll always be guaranteed to be emotionally alone and drained to some degree. If you’re in a relationship with a narcissist person, beware the alluring attempts of trying to win and flip this person by attempting to nurture them, the odds are it’s never going to happen.
Also, don’t ever expect to have your sensitivity to be ever honored. These people are sour on love by knowing all the loopholes, all the roadblocks and mazes which you’ll have to jump through just to please these chumps.
If you feel that a narcissist is emptying you out emotionally, then try using any of these methods to get some of your power back.
Lower Your Expectations While You Strategize Your Needs
Keep your expectations as realistic as possible. Try enjoying all of their good qualities, but also understand that they’re emotionally limited, even if they happen to be sophisticated in other ways.
Once you accept this, then you won’t be continuously asking support from your friends, coworkers or family. We all know the definition of insanity: Continuing to do the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
Stop Making Your Emotional Self-worth Completely Dependent On Them
Don’t ever get caught in the easy trap of always trying to please them. You need to protect and develop your own sensitivity as well. Refrain from confiding all of your deepest feelings to someone who won’t respond back, care or cherish them, even if they tell you they do.
Show Them Something That Will Benefit Them
To be able to successfully communicate with that narcissist, you can attempt to frame things differently. If you directly state your needs on what you want, that will rarely work, getting angry doesn’t work either, nor does constant demanding.
So begin by talking to them on something, any topic, which means something to them. Instead of saying, “I’d really like to go out for a family dinner,” re-frame it to say, “Everyone there really likes your company. They would be absolutely delighted to have you there at the family dinner.”
To your employer, instead of you saying… “I would rather prefer to work fewer nights,” you should rather be saying, “I would be able to bring in much higher revenue during the early morning hours for your company, rather than working evenings all the time.”
Obviously, it’s a better situation not to have to contend and continuously stroke the tedious egotistical narcissist. But if it’s completely unavoidable, then using these techniques may alleviate a bit of the outcome.
This is for you, and you know who you are.