Building Up Your Self-Esteem Because You’re Not That Great
What most nurturing parents will do is tell their child how great they are. That they’re unique, special one of a kind, that they’re an outstanding human. Then they’ll gloat that little Jimmy is so athletic, or that he could count to 100, or that Anna is so cute, this to others.
Then we actually begin to believe and become proud of ourselves, that we are truly special people. As we then go through the passage of school, begin to grow a mind of our own with opinions, we gasp. Hey wait a minute, “I’m not that great like mommy says.”
As we grow older and become more objective, we begin to compare ourselves with others, our peers. This is when our self-esteem takes a dive, as our artificially pumped up confidence takes a blow.
The Great Equalizer
Some may go to argue that someone who’s humble is a paragon of integrity, and is usually so, but being humble and having low self esteem is different. Those who are modest know what they’ve got, they just don’t flaunt it.
There are some with low self-esteem who’ll act confident and at times even arrogant. They put up a false front while constantly reminding themselves that they’re not good enough. Or they don’t give themselves enough credit for their virtues or accomplishments.
This type of self-criticism can be demeaning, and over time, its consequences can become mentally damaging. What a lack of self-assurance does is it fosters insecurity, which then breeds a host of unwelcome emotions.
Behaving badly then results, with negative emotions such as envy, anxiety, depression, obesity, substance abuse, and other related disorders that are associated with a low self confidence.
An Attack On Our Esteem
Our self-esteem is tested on a daily basis, and unless one is stationed alone in the Arctic or the Amazon, or is a full fledged narcissist, it’s a common and unavoidable confrontation.
Those who opposes and challenges us, or those who we compare ourselves to, such as that movie star, the annoying critical boss, a successful relative or neighbor, or our judgmental peers, all can make us feel less accomplished and a failure.
What compounds this insecurity is social media such as Facebook. It’s found that the prolonged use of this platform can negatively impact ones self-esteem, women generally being influenced more than men.
To Manage Your Outlook
What we all need to know are the triggers which adversely impacts our self-esteem, which affects our insecurity, as they are countless and ubiquitous, this because you can’t avoid them, so you need to know how to filter them out.
Don’t allow the everyday nagging things to affect you, those which can force you to second guess what you’re doing, your every move, which can self deprecate and devalue your worth.
To be conscious of them will make an improvement in your life. The battle for most on a daily basis is to combat the insecurities while building up immunity and self confidence.
Dictate Your Self-Talk
We can at times be our own worst enemy, our toughest critic and biggest bully, and it’s usually not the world out there to blame. It’s that negative voice of doubt inside your head that tells you you’re not good enough.
So just stop being so negative, this by allowing all your doubts and fears to govern your thinking and dominate this self talk.
Instead, practice positivity instead, this by knowing what you’re capable of, what you’ve accomplished, and then congratulate yourself on your wins while focusing on getting better.
Write Down What You’re Good At
Such as that you’re excellent at your job, or that you’re a great cook, or you’re more physically fit than most because of your outstanding health and fitness regimen.
What most can find are a few things that they excel at over others, so go ahead and make a list of as many qualities that you can think of. The small everyday things are the ones which really matters.
Never Compare Yourself To Others
One thing that mom was right about, is that we’re all unique. How we look, how our personalities are completely different from everyone else, as is our skill sets and circumstances.
Realize that there will always be someone better than you at doing something, while you’ll be better at doing certain things over others. Comparison and competing is a losers game which usually results in disappointment.
Set Attainable Goals
Having big dreams are great but reaching them can be too difficult at times. When you know that you’re doing your best, but that goal isn’t getting any closer, it’s then easy to become discouraged.
You need to be realistic when measuring your progress, by altering your “master” plan into smaller pieces. Set reachable time frames for each goal while defining certain criteria for evaluating your success.
What doing so will allow you to measure your progress more accurately towards the bigger goal, and make sure that you recognize and celebrate your smaller wins which will keep you motivated.
Prioritize Your Day
Some days will feel wasted while accomplishing nothing, this despite being busy. At times, there’s so much to do that you don’t know where to begin. You get overwhelmed, confused, overly excited, and start spinning your wheels and get nothing done.
You need to set your priorities straight, otherwise you’ll never manage your time effectively. So make a “to-do” list on a daily basis, and list them according to their urgency, while allotting adequate time needed for each task.
Remain realistic when it comes to your abilities, this to avoid any disappointment or regret. What your life is made up of are these days, so don’t waste a single one of them.