What most nurturing parents will do is tell their child how great they are. That they’re unique, special one of a kind, they’re an outstanding human. Then they’ll gloat that little Jimmy is so athletic, or he could count to 100, or Anna is so cute, to everyone who’ll listen.
Then we actually begin to believe and become proud of ourselves, that we are truly special people.
As we then go through the passage of school, begin to grow a mind of our own with opinions, we gasp. Hey wait a minute, “I’m not that great like mommy says.”
As we grow older and become more objective, we begin to compare ourselves with others, our peers.
This is when our self-esteem takes a dive, as our artificially pumped up confidence takes a blow.
The Great Equalizer
Some may argue someone who’s humble is a paragon of integrity, and is usually so, but being humble and having low self esteem is different.
Those who are modest know what they’ve got, they just don’t flaunt it.
There are some with low self-esteem who’ll act confident, egotistical and at times even arrogant.
They put up a false front while constantly reminding themselves they’re not good enough. Or they don’t give themselves enough credit for their virtues or accomplishments.
This type of self-criticism can be demeaning, and over time, its consequences can become mentally damaging.
What a lack of self-assurance does is it fosters insecurity, which then breeds a host of unwelcome emotions.
Behaving badly then results, with negative emotions such as envy, anxiety, depression, obesity, substance abuse, and other related disorders associated with a low self confidence.
An Attack On Our Esteem
Our self-esteem is tested on a daily basis. Unless one is stationed alone in the Arctic or the Amazon, or is a full fledged narcissist, it’s a common and unavoidable confrontation.
Those who opposes and challenges us, or those who we compare ourselves to, can batter our self esteem.
We compare ourselves to that movie star, the annoying critical boss, a successful relative or neighbour, or our judgmental peers, all who can make us feel less accomplished and a failure.
What compounds this insecurity is social media such as Facebook. It’s found the prolonged use of this platform can negatively impact self-esteem, women generally being influenced more than men.
To Manage Your Outlook
What we all need to know are the triggers which adversely impacts our self-esteem, and feel inferior.
Doing so affects our insecurity, as they are countless and ubiquitous, because you can’t avoid them, so you need to know how to filter them out.
Don’t allow the everyday nagging things to affect you, those which can force you to second guess what you’re doing, your every move, which can self deprecate and devalue your worth.
To be conscious of them will make an improvement in your life. The battle for most on a daily basis is to combat the insecurities while building up immunity and self confidence.
Dictate Your Self-Talk
We can at times be our own worst enemy, our toughest critic and biggest bully, and it’s usually not the world out there to blame.
It’s that negative voice of doubt inside your head that tells you you’re not good enough.
So just stop being so negative, by allowing all your doubts and fears to govern your thinking and dominate this self talk.
Instead, practice being positive by knowing what you’re capable of, what you’ve accomplished, and then congratulate yourself on your wins while focusing on getting better.
Write Down What You’re Good At
Such as you’re excellent at your job, or you’re a great cook, or you’re more physically fit than most because of your outstanding health and fitness regimen.
What most can find are a few things they excel at over others, so go make a list of as many qualities you can think of. The small everyday things are the ones which really matters.
Never Compare Yourself To Others
One thing mom was right about, is we’re all unique. How we look, how our personalities are completely different from everyone else, as is our skill sets and circumstances.
Realize there will always be someone better than you at doing something, while you’ll be better at doing certain things over others.
Comparing and competing against others, is a losers game which usually results in disappointment.
Set Attainable Goals
Having big dreams are great but reaching them can be too difficult at times. When you know you’re doing your best, but that goal isn’t getting any closer, can become discouraging.
You need to be realistic when measuring your progress, by altering your “master” plan into smaller pieces.
Set reachable time frames for each goal while defining certain criteria for evaluating your success.
What doing so will allow you to measure your progress more accurately towards the bigger goal. Make sure you recognize and celebrate your smaller wins which will help you get motivated.
Prioritize Your Day
Some days will feel like a waste of time while accomplishing nothing, despite being busy.
At times, there’s so much to do you don’t know where to begin. You get overwhelmed, confused, overly excited, and start spinning your wheels and get nothing done.
You need to set your priorities straight, otherwise you’ll never manage your time effectively.
So make a “to-do” list on a daily basis, and list them according to their urgency, while allotting adequate time needed for each task.
Remain realistic when it comes to your abilities, to avoid any disappointment or regret. What your life is made up of are these days, so don’t waste a single one of them.