What we constantly think of is to make ourselves feel bad, defeat ourselves by believing our poor thoughts and actions. We ruminate over an embarrassing moment that happened a week ago. We beat ourselves up by saying one thing, then doing another.
As we worry about the future, what we’re doing is harming our ability to live a full life today. We believe the mistakes we make, will just carry over to tomorrow.
What if, instead, we decide to ask ourselves, “How much better can I make myself feel at this moment?”
What’s known, is our brains are just as adept at making us feel better, as it is making us feel worse about ourselves.
For many of us, what we tend to think are negative thoughts by default, even though we know happy fun thoughts significantly makes us feel better.
Try This Exercise
Close your eyes and intentionally frown. Think of a time you were upset about yourself and the world, and recall how mad you were.
Now open your eyes and take a look around. Take note of what catches your attention.
Notice the sounds that you hear, how bleak the colors are, how the environment reflects how upset you’re feeling. Soak in these negative thoughts.
Now let that feeling go. This by physically shaking your hands and your head, chase away that upset feeling. Stand up and walk around a bit. Make sure those bad feelings are gone.
Smile And The World Will…
Now close your eyes again and intentionally smile. Recall a recent time when you felt happy. Take a few deep breaths into your upper chest, and relive that good feeling.
Once you’re feeling happy, open your eyes and take a good look around again, take note if your surroundings look any different.
What most find is that their environment reflects the emotional state they’re feeling. When upset, the world looks drab, it appears doom and gloom.
What thinking happy thoughts does, is makes the world a brighter more brilliant place with cheerier voices, vivid pleasant sights and pretty smells everywhere.
Those In Love
Now recall the first time you fell in love. You know that feeling of skipping instead of walking down the street. When you couldn’t stop your knees from knocking together.
That magical glow of being in love, which always brings a smile to your face. This phenomenon of feeling heroically good when in love, is so ubiquitous that it’s become a cliché.
Whether you’re in love right now or not, you can still entertain the feeling that love provides. Know that if you’ve “lost that loving feeling,” there’s ways to get it back.
Relive the joy you felt in the pit of your stomach from that first kiss. The feeling of sadness when that person walked away.
Now feel that void in the groin, especially if your relationship has recently taken a turn for the worst.
Know that every love affair starts off with a bang, with passionate flashes of bliss. Recall them, relive those moments regardless if contempt has recently crept into the relationship.
Bring Back That Loving Feeling
What you permanently want to recapture is that state of being in love, and do so at will. So begin to recall those extraordinary feelings of being in love.
Most likely they’re just a distant memory for you or they may be painful because you were hurt. So this feeling is lying dormant in your psyche. You know the feeling is there somewhere, so reactivate them.
Even if there’s no recollection, or you’ve never been in love, there are plenty of instances of people around you that you can see, who are in love.
What the brain isn’t capable of is distinguishing between what’s real and what’s fictional, this especially if it’s vividly imagined and felt.
So grasp this opportunity to enjoy that feeling of love and lock it in, even if you’ve never experienced it.
Reenact or “pretend” this glorious feeling of bliss. Vividly visualize their face, their voice, that glare, that touch. Recall a specific place, or a song when you first met, that reminds you of these feelings.
To Relive Love
It may initially start slow at first, but once you commit to imagining the sensory details of a time you were in love, what you’ll discover are two things:
• The more you dwell on them, the more vivid the details will come streaming back to you, this supplied by your imagination
• You’ll discover how relaxed and expanded you feel, once fantasizing these thoughts
Feeling this is infinitely better than worrying about everything.
So what you need is to pursue and flush out all your worry circuits, locate them and chase them out, to allow room for your loving thoughts.
These loving thoughts also don’t need to be real or sentimental, they just need to be happy thoughts and feelings, the more happier and robust, the better.
Learn To Love Yourself At Will
What you now want is to turn all of this “recollecting” of your love thoughts into a habit, so they’ll become routine and available whenever you’re feeling sad.
What constantly rehearsing yourself into doing so does, is forces all the memories and its associated feelings of love, to come flowing back to you.
As proficient as you are at worrying, you’ll become an expert at recalling and reminiscing love, as it takes the same effort.
To make this permanent, recall your most pleasant thought, then embrace it by physically squeezing your left fist, to lock in that happy thought.
Begin manufacturing and collecting all of your most pleasant thoughts in your life, that’s worthy of this “fist” squeeze.
Make This Feeling Routine
Every time you recall or experience a happy loving feeling, acknowledge it by squeezing your fist. Keep telling yourself you feel great and continue to do so.
Know that what squeezing your fist does, is recalls and reproduces those associated loving feelings that you’ve catalogued.
What squeezing your fist does is acts as an “anchor,” the signal that resets your brain and reproduces your previously stored happy loving thoughts.
Once you activate this anchor, you’re triggering the feelings of love that you stored and they will activate on cue.
To Activate Love
So imagine your partner of ten years. You smile at that person and squeeze your fist.
What you’re instantly experiencing are feelings of infatuation, the same ones you felt the first time you met, and fell in love.
Once you begin the fist squeeze love anchor routine, make it a habit and squeeze your fist every time you see your love.
Soon, what doing so does is it serves as a signal for loving that person even more, while repeatedly falling in love with them over and over again.
Can You Turn On Love At Will?
The question becomes, are these recalled and created feelings of love real, or just an illusion? Is the mind playing tricks on you.
Realize just like all of your negative feelings and the worrying are contrived illusions of the mind, it doesn’t matter if your recall of love is real or not.
Since the brain can only singularity think of one thing at a time, why not make them happy loving thoughts, and you can do so by just squeezing your fist.