People will always lie, either to themselves, but usually to others whom they love, for protection or for their own good, this so they usually won’t cause any further damage.
Lying can become a weapon, a technique which is used to manipulate, control, or influence others through fabrication of the truth.
This manipulation is usually directed towards the feeling, thoughts, and behaviors of others.
Lying is difficult to some, but completely natural for others, as they will begin to throw around little fibs to influence awareness, thought, or effort.
Telling lies usually begins when we’re young as it’s a well known weapon that kids use, as they have a knack for dramatically altering the truth in their favor to get what they want.
They also learn it quite early in life as a manipulative tool which the parents usually fall for. As they grow older and become adults, the lying for various reasons continue.
Not only is lying to each other common in every mindset and every language throughout the world, it also has several different formats.
On occasion, people will just tell an outright bold lie, they’ll say something that’s completely and explicitly not true, bordering on fraud, which can also be obvious to the receiver.
At times, lying to others can also be accomplished by what’s not said, or left out, this known as a lie of omission.
In these cases, the speaker will intentionally leave out information that’s critical, usually regarding what, who, why, when, where, while leading their listeners to believing that the entire story or issue has be told.
As someone once keenly noted, “Half of the truth is often a great lie.”
Why People Lie To You And Others
Why would people even bother to lie to anyone in the first place. What motive could they have by telling the fib, this especially to those who they happen to know or love.
It’s known that lying to someone is usually motivated by a few outlining factors:
• To Avoid Punishment – Lying at times is a popular method and most commonly used to avoid any form of punishment, or possibly because of being rejected.
If you know that a partner or a spouse is going to react poorly to what the truth is, then some will generally hide, alter, or conceal the truth.
It’s human nature that people will always try to avoid any form of punishment or harm, even if it comes down to individuals having to lie in order to do so.
This begins when we were children and pick up this skill early in our lives to protect ourselves, or to get what we want. Since it’s effective, we then continue this manipulation as adults.
• A Method To Seek Approval – Most will do anything to avoid any form of punishment, but we as individuals also have an inbuilt universal need for approval by others, our peers, or superiors.
So deception and telling outright lies are often used to create a favorable impression or image. Some individuals will also go to great lengths using intensive coverups to creating a positive image for themselves.
At times, this also involves some methods of extreme coverup as well, and then they’ll also begin believing and adopting their own false persona, the fake image that they’ve created as true.
• Anything To Maintain Privacy – What everyone wants at times is privacy from others or being found, want to seek a sense of independence, freedom, or complete autonomy.
Individuals will usually want to feel that they’re in complete control of their lives, this especially when it comes to revealing personal information regarding themselves.
Just because someone’s in a close relationship which may be discreet, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they need to completely give up their right to, or give up one’s privacy entirely.
So a bit of lying to outright camouflage will be used and can at times become useful when attempting to maintain a sense of self which is independent and autonomous.
• Avoiding Different Types Of Conflict – Once reality sets in, most couples will rarely see eye-to-eye on a few of the major issues which will arise. So as a result, they’ll begin engaging in what appears like never ending conflict sessions on a wide range of issues.
This continuous engagement of conflict can often become damaging in the majority of relationships whether it’s stable or not.
So rather than choosing to continuously argue about each and every issue, it’s just a lot easier and more convenient for them to avoid conflict by just pretending to get along, by telling little white lies.
• Regulating Power And Control – Regardless if people will acknowledge it or not, there’s always a constant power struggle between each and every active relationship.
What this power struggle involves is the push and pull which occurs to gain control whenever it comes to the decision making process. This struggle will always transfer back and forth, this depending on the issue at hand.
For instance, one partner may have all of the financial power, while the other may have control over all social situations.
Generally, the person who happens to lack the power in any given situation are more likely to lie, this in order to somehow influence or compensate the outcome in their favor.
Children are more likely to lie to their parents, employees will generally lie to their employers, etc., as the less dominant person will always lie in any relationship to gain or equal the edge.
What lying does is it helps individuals to even the playing field, to compensate themselves, this because of the power shift differentials which may exist.