Money. You know the green stuff that’s hard to get, easy to spend and what makes the world go around. Yes you heard right, money issues is on the top of the list, the key contributor that leads to fights, breakups, separation, and ultimately divorce.
Without a doubt, the differences in opinion vary when it comes to money management between partners. It’s the main reason why it can dissolve a relationship.
In fact, it could be on your very first date, and you find out the person is a cheapskate, a big turnoff.
Or you could be living common law, and your partner is constantly borrowing or stealing money from you.
Money and it’s transparency, has the most powerful influence over people and their love life.
You may have a habit of being completely reckless at spending cash, and negligent when it comes to financial planning.
What this creates is a negative effect on your partner, and quickly shortens the lifespan of an otherwise promising relationship.
Poor Money Management
There’s really no quick fix or an easy algorithm you can apply to determine how efficient, or how bad you are as a money manager.
There are signs however, indicators and clues which are “red flags,” when it comes to your habits of wanting to spend or hoard money.
Signs You May Have Bad Money Management Habits
• You constantly accumulate credit card debt and don’t bother paying it off monthly, even if your salary can cover it
• Even if you have money in the bank, you’re still always chronically worried about money
• You’re an impulsive shopper where you have a penchant for buying expensive things. You then get home, and don’t know why you even bought it
• You drive around in an expensive car attached with a loan you know you can’t afford, while you don’t yet own a condo or a home
• You have some type of loan you’re paying off other than a student loan, car loan, or a mortgage
• Someone at one time or another such as a partner or your parents, has repeatedly expressed concern on the way you spend and handle money
The Two Attitudes Of Money
There are two distinct attitudes, when it comes to money. These different viewpoints also aren’t reconcilable, as they’re polar opposites.
This is the reason why it’s critical that couples, especially newly weds, need to learn to agree to disagree when it comes to their particular “money” personality.
This way, the futile and endless fights over money should cease to some extent.
1 – Those Who Like To Save
Often viewed by your partner as “cheap” or thrifty. Money is so valuable to you it’s cherished, hoarded, and worshiped.
The saving of it, gives you a gratifying sense of stability and accomplishment.
You believe it’s better not to spend any of it, and just invest it, which is noble.
Since money is so precious to you, once any of it is spent, it’s with the utmost circumspection.
So any gratuitous or frivolous purchases which can’t be justified, is rigorously avoided.
Any self indulgent or unnecessary expenditure, is kept completely under control.
Money at all times, needs to be handled as wisely as possible with great restraint and discretion.
Having achieved considerable wealth, doesn’t constitute reason to profligate.
Regardless of any material circumstances, money is something that should be held on to. The value of money lies in not spending it, but rather in saving it.
2 – Those Who Like Too Spend
Viewed as “compulsive shoppers” by your partner. Money is an “easy come easy go” liquid commodity.
The belief is it should be spent quickly in a variety of ways to increase your personal satisfaction, to fill a void in your self-esteem.
Money when available to you, should always be spent for goods and services, given away as gifts, as it further contributes to your well being and happiness.
Because of the availability of credit, you don’t care how much something costs, as you can just charge it on your credit card.
You just buy whatever strikes your fancy, for instant gratification. The value of any amount of money, just emanates how spendable it is.
How To Manage Money For Chronic Spenders
If you realize you may have issues when it comes to managing your money. Or you, your partner, and anyone else close to you are constantly arguing about your money spending habits, then take notes.
When combined with the struggling economy, it creates a volatile cocktail which compounds to make things even worse.
If you realize your money management methods is becoming an issue, then it’s recommended you confront the situation as soon as possible.
Improving Your Money Management Skills
There are a few immediate behaviors which you can engage in, to improve your poor money management skills.
• Begin by doing diligent research on money saving tips, by going online or to the local bookstore or library. Find information which specifically focuses on the psychology and management of chronic money spending
• Absorb as much information as possible, and have a discussion with your significant other. Decide to make a vow, you’ll change your poor money management habits
• Create a Financial Management Plan. When applying this, identify the top two or three most significant money issues you’re having, and find a solution for each of them
Also come up with a firm deadline, on when the particular problem will be resolved. Make sure you’re as specific and detailed as possible.
Just Talk About It
When it comes to effective money management and it’s related problems, open up and just talk about it.
You can talk with your bank, parents, friends, and other couples. Ask them if they have similar issues. They most likely do, so ask them how they’re handling it.
This process of working out your issues yourself, is known as “conductive interviews.” This since what you’re essentially doing, is wanting and seeking out answers as well as ideas from others.
Ideas you can potentially apply to your own money management problems, and then improve your circumstances and situation as a result.
What you need is to apply true commitment to make positive changes. It’s up to you to improve your money management skills, which protects the longevity of your relationships.