What the narcissistic parent doesn’t seek is the approval of anyone, their parents, spouse, or siblings, or be even loved by their children. What they consider them to be are just audience members to watch their arrogance, on the stage which is their inflated grandiosity.
All this narcissistic parent wants is the focus to be on them, that they’re in charge and wants everyone to know.
Their ultimate wish is to shock them, impress them, threaten them, infuse them with awe, to inspire them to get their attention, or to manipulate them.
To make the point they’re in control, what they say goes, for anyone who dares to confront them. They constantly demand this attention.
What they do is emulate a host of emotions, while employing every means to achieve these effects. They lie as they bow to their false god.
They can act pitiful, spiteful, the exact opposite of what others beg them to be. Once confronted, they default into several phases of disorder and insanity.
Seen As Threats
What they perceive their siblings or kids to be, are threats to their ego, such as the attention taken away from them.
They feel they’re intruding on their turf, insulted as they invade their pathological space.
They do their best to belittle others, mentally by emotionally hurting them, constantly humiliating them, all while enjoying the aftereffects.
If these reactions ever prove to be ineffective or counter productive, they’ll retreat back into their imaginary world of omnipotence.
A period of detachment and emotional absence then ensues, as they retrace and plot their next move.
They then proceed to indulge themselves in self delusions of grandeur, planning for future interference.
This dysfunctional parent will react this way right from when their children are born, or a sibling dares to interfere with their delusional path.
Afraid Of Competition
Whoever they perceive to be in direct competition with them, what they automatically consider is that violator to be the enemy.
What then ensues is aggression and hostility, aggravated by the real or perceived threat of the spotlight being lifted away from them.
Rather than attacking the issue, they’ll at times disconnect, detach themselves emotionally, becoming cold and uninterested, or will direct their rage to those closest to them.
Am I Good Enough
What this narcissistic parent doesn’t seek is the admiration or approval of their parents. They’ll take the credit for their child’s achievements, while every failure is not their fault.
As the children begin to grow older, the hope of this parent is they idolize them, adore them, to worship their deeds and capabilities.
They do so in the hopes they’ll blindly trust and praise them, surrender to their charisma while becoming submerged in their narcissistic persona.
Do What I Say
What then arises is the risk of mental abuse, attempting to influence their thinking, once anyone gets out of line and crosses their path.
What the narcissist parent does is derives gratification from having coital relationships with those who are physically or mentally inferior, the inexperienced or the dependent.
The older the siblings or children get, the more difficult it becomes for them to maintain control over them, they often becoming judgmental.
The reason for this is because they’re then able to place into context and perspective, the reasons for their actions, to question their intent, to anticipate their motivations better.
As the child matures, what they often refuse is to continue being their pawn. Some will escape their stranglehold and live a life of their own, fully detached.
What they begin to hold is a grudge against them because of how they were treated when younger, when they were less capable of resistance.
Goes Full Circle
This brings the narcissist parent back full circle, as they once again perceive their siblings or their children as being threats.
They become disillusioned and devaluing, may become emotionally remote, absent and cold, while rejecting any effort to communicate with them, citing the scarceness of time.
What they feel is burdened, wanting to escape from their obligations, to abandon their commitments to those who has become totally useless to them.
They don’t understand why they need to support them, or suffer their company as they believe they’ve been deliberately or ruthlessly trapped.
What they then do is rebel by either being passive aggressive, which is evident by the scowl on their face, or by intentionally sabotaging their relationship.
They can become overly critical, aggressive, arrogant, unpleasant, psychologically and verbally abusive.
To justify their actions to themselves and others, they get immersed into conspiracy theories with clear paranoid hues.
Parental And Sibling Narcissism
A parent with a narcissistic personality disorder, will use the people closest to them as mere instruments for their gratification, while manipulating them in their favour.
With the narcissist’s inability to abide by the personal boundaries which are set by others, placing all in their path as victims of their destruction, they receive verbal and emotional lashing.
Their possessiveness and panoply of negative emotions, transforms into aggression such as rage and envy.
Then at times the victim might fight back, and what they receive is a slap in the face.
They Against The World
In their mind, they feel everyone is conspiring against them, because of their belittling, humiliating, or insubordinate ways.
This narcissistic parent ultimately gets what they deserve, to have those who they hurt disintegrate, to their great sorrow. They then feel besieged and becomes suffocated by their own wrath.
They might rebel and erupt into a series of self-defeating and self-destructive behaviour, which leads to the decomposition of their life.
Then doomed to ruin, the narcissist becomes predictable in their own “death wish,” as this cycle comes back and haunts them.
What this sets up is a life of bad karma as they grow older, as all the knives are thrown back at them, while they live alone in a nursing home, wondering what went wrong.