They can come across as being charismatic and convincing, the drama queens among us. They’ll draw you into their personal emergency web and attention issues. They’ll ask for your help, they want you to help in solving their distress, so of course you do.
They know they’ve got you hooked. They’ll then present another problem, then another until you finally realize that for them, manufacturing problems is a way for them to get attention. What they’re looking for is an audience, using their urgent demands to control you.
By you responding to them, your life gets caught in the turmoil of their daily soap opera dramas. They can approach you in a variety of ways. There are the chronic woe is me complainers, who’d be pounding at your door with an apparent nervous breakdown.
What they have is a parade of perceived emergencies, demands, or reveals of look at me, which you, and only you can solve for them.
Know The Identifiable Patterns
What you begin to recognize are patterns of urgent demands which violates your boundaries, incessant complaints, or even flattery. They continuously claim that you’re the “only” one that they can turn to.
What they do is ambush your emotions by appealing to your ego, sympathy, you wanting to be a good helpful person. For some reason that you’re not able to satisfy their demands, they then accuse you of being selfish, that you don’t care about them, and they sulk.
What they focus on is they appearing weak and vulnerable, as what they’ve mastered is the art of manipulation. They live to create endless drama incisively, which drives everyone batty, and we’ll usually give in attempting to help them.
This their life, to create unnecessary disturbance in others for their attention and entertainment. What they need is to change these unhealthy cognitive patterns, recognize that they need to change their attitude and how they come across.
Why All The Drama
What needs to be defined is what drama actually is. What a “drama queen” implies is that it’s a female issue which it isn’t. Both males and females are equally guilty and capable of drawing more energy from their target then what’s necessary.
Drama has a close kinship to high maintenance, which can manifest itself into behaviors which can be different when it comes to masculinity and femininity. So make no mistake that it’s an equal gender issue.
So instead of typecasting, the proper term should be “drama persona.” The biggest issue is, what can you do if one crosses your path. The most convenient answer is to do nothing, as it’s a deliberate conscious and targeted act.
Creating needless drama is considered a symptom, an expression which stems from unaddressed childhood issues. If you happen to participate, all that you’re doing is feeding the thirst of those who appears to be trapped in their own time warp.
This vortex is determined to suck you into their own personal self-esteem issues by creating chaos, this based on issues which were never resolved. It’s an ego that’s gone berserk, attempting to right a wrong which has contextual origins in the past.
Look At Me “It’s All About Me”
What the drama persona thrives on is attention, because it fills the feeling of emptiness, feeling invisible, inadequate, or unimportant. This is where all the dramatic motivation usually stems from.
What they’re doing is attempting to convince themselves, by they trying to convince you, that they do matter, they are important. They’re blind to the feelings of others as they have failed to develop the proper coping skills which are necessary to being a full fledged adult.
Refer to it as arrested development, call it a failure to evolve, to grow up. What lies dormant is they knowing that they need to grow up, to outgrow their negative mental blocks.
The alarming part is that if their behavior wasn’t so annoying, that you’d genuinely care about these people, and there are excellent reasons to have compassion for them. But ironically, this is what they want from you.
The Lack Of Self-Esteem
Whether they believe that they weren’t loved enough, never good enough, pretty or smart enough, not accepted or wanted, an internal narrative develops, this on an unconscious level.
During this process, what they’ve crafted is a way to exhaust everyone in their current path by replaying whatever story that they’re telling themselves. So they act them out and they involve you in it.
Living With The Drama
Despite all of their efforts of they attempting to involve you somehow, there’s nothing that you can do to effectively change them, this since changing them means attempting to alter their attitudes, to change their personal history.
Doing so can be impossible since it’s an embedded pattern of their past. It’s there so don’t try to alter it. Each and every drama personality needs to decide for themselves to embark on a road towards self-awareness, growth, and change.
If they don’t, the will to remain in this pattern becomes impenetrable. The only thing that you can do is to better manage yourself, which is often do nothing, avoid their path when it comes into play. Know how and where to draw the line.
Know when you should just walk away, try to avoid confronting what they do because they can’t emotionally handle it, and then you’ll put them into a tail spin.
Just tell them that their drama doesn’t work on you, this since they’re usually conscious of what they’re doing, and you’re calling them out. Then they’ll usually disengage from their behavior, at least with you and will move their pettiness on to someone else.