We’re just this one singular entity, a speck, just another “number” in this massive world we live in. We can somewhat control our lives, our destiny, such as our health, what we eat or how we behave. But beyond that, most external things are out of our hands, and we can’t do much about it.
This becomes apparent as young children, as from birth, we’re told how to act, what type of clothes to wear, to mind our manners.
What we’re taught in school is curriculum education, learning about ourselves, and the world around us. Some of us fail, most succeed, as we attempt to conform. Then we’re set free, in this thing called life.
There’s a brutal truth the majority of us refuses to accept, and that’s we’re basically helpless, as we have little control over the external things which happens to us on a daily basis.
Swimming Up Stream
What some will do is constantly resist the force, the truth, while becoming control freaks. What we’ll do is micromanage, delegate tasks, while attempting to convince others to change their behaviour.
What we’re thinking is, if I can gain enough control over others, along with the situations they find themselves in, then I can hopefully avert bad things from happening to me.
Most realize fate happens, and they can’t do anything about it. Yet, they’ll constantly worry, they stress over everything from deadly diseases to natural disasters.
They’ll dwell on things they can’t control, which just burns time and energy, not realizing worry is futile.
Know What You Can Control
If you worry about something, take a step back and examine how much control you have over the situation.
What you can’t prevent is an upcoming thunderstorm, but only prepare for it. You can’t control someone’s behaviour, but how you react to them.
Know most often, all you’re able to control is your effort, attitude, or reaction.
Once you begin directing your energy into the things you can only control, you’ll then become more concise and effective.
Focus On How Influential You Are
What many have, is influence over others and the circumstances they face. What they can’t always do however, is force situations to go in their favour.
What you can do, is give your kids all the tools they need so they’ll excel in school, but that won’t guarantee them straight A’s. You can throw a party, but you can’t force your guests to have fun.
To become influential, what you need to focus on is changing your behaviour. What you need is to be the best role model possible, while setting healthy reasonable boundaries for yourself.
If you have concerns over the choices someone makes, then share your opinion but do so just once. Never try to constantly fix people, because perhaps, they don’t want to be fixed.
Know What Your Fears Are
Always be asking yourself, what you’re most afraid of that might occur. Are you predicting something that’s catastrophic. Are you doubting yourself, on how you cope with disappointment.
Most often, the worst case scenario isn’t as drastic as envisioned. Usually, you’re a lot stronger than you think you are.
Most worry by saying, “My business is failing.” What they don’t ask themselves is, “If my business does fail, what would I do?”
Knowing the worst case scenario and acknowledging it, does is places your energy and focus into making better decisions.
Know The Difference Between Problem Solving And Ruminating
What doesn’t help, is you constantly replaying previous conversations or situations in your mind, or imagining catastrophic outcomes on a continuous basis. Realize solving the problem does.
Determine if what you’re thinking is productive. If you’re actually and actively solving a problem, such as attempting to find ways to become more successful, then continue to work on the solutions.
But if you happen to be wasting your time ruminating on things, then learn how to change your focus and direction in your brain first.
Once acknowledging your current thoughts aren’t productive, then get active by doing something different for a few moments, to get your brain directed towards something that’s more productive.
Learn How To Manage Your Stress Better
Always exercise, always be eating the proper foods, and make sure you get plenty of sleep, which are all components of taking better care of yourself.
Become mindful to the point you’re able to manage your stress, so it doesn’t become a distraction. Then you can operate at peak efficiently.
Find healthy ways to relieve stress such as meditation, yoga or exercise. Spend more time with family and friends who don’t annoy, or engage in a favourite hobby.
Constantly be monitoring your stress levels, and how you can manage it the best. Eliminate all bad vices.
Develop Healthy Affirmations
You should be training your brain to react in one of two ways. To take action, or to calm yourself down. To do what it takes, or to think rationally.
Once you find yourself saying something like, “I’m hoping I’ll do okay,” instead, tell yourself to “make it happen.” What doing so does, is reminds you you’re in control of your actions.
If you say something you have no control over, such as “I hope it doesn’t rain today,” then tell yourself, “I can get through this.”
Always keep these simple affirmations with you at all times. They’ll help you from wasting time on things you can’t control.
You’ll then either do all you can to make it happen, or deal with things you have no control over.
Develop a few healthy affirmations, which will keep you mentally strong. They’ll help you combat self-doubt, unrealistic situations, or from ruminating.