How Introverted Narcissists Can Elevate Their Low Self-Esteem

They’re usually an absolute professional at their job, perhaps a tad smug, but internally they’re an emotional mess. They can be pleasant on the surface, yet they feel as it they haven’t accomplished anything in their life. These are introverts with a huge ego.

The evidence is once you compliment them on their achievements, the successes they’ve realized, they’ll never acknowledge it, or thank you. They feel embarrassed instead.

The accomplishments achieved, should project their self-confidence, but for one reason or another, they don’t feel secure or comfortable about it.

The reason being, they secretly think they’ll be exposed for being incompetent, found to be a fraud.

They feel others will eventually find out they’re not genuine, they’ve been fooling everyone including themselves, this entire time.

Everything they’ve achieved in their life, is a hologram of their true self. So why would they feel this way.

This is someone who graduated at the top of their class, landed a profession to suit their aptitude, and quickly accelerated up the career ladder in an occupation they’re suited for.

Yet, they continue to doubt themselves, and their abilities.

The Narcissist Who Lacks Confidence

These two personality types may appear to be polar opposites. Ironically, the root of their insecurity, lies in their narcissism.

The doubt they have, when it comes to their academic and professional success. All they continue to focus on, is their previous failures.

With a tad of embarrassment, they’ll tell you what they’ve accomplished, but their body language tells you otherwise, which exposes their low self-esteem.

You then wonder why someone who’s achieved so much, suffers from low confidence.

The Plight Of The Awkward

There’s plenty of evidence regarding individuals and their low self-esteem, this as a clinical observation, and isn’t an accusation or finger pointing.

This is found to be a genuine condition, based on their life experiences and perceived mistreatment.

This is a condition many professionals suffer from, and that’s failing to come across as being a personable or a friendly person.

Instead, they appear to be egotistical as a front, which stems from the fear of not being liked.


About Being Human

Narcissism has received a bad rap lately. This because of it’s blanket definition, which is someone who’s arrogant and successful, and void of empathy.

Someone who appears self-centered, and egotistically thinks only for themselves. The thing is, narcissism isn’t found to be that bad, especially the healthy type.

What self-love does, is forces one to do good things, treat themselves well, set high standards, while taking pleasure in life.

Excessive narcissism however, has a reputation of making demands for attention which shelters an extremely fragile ego.

One that’s vulnerable and gets easily hurt. They feel rejected and inferior, and their brashness covers it.

There’s no blanket theory when it comes to narcissism. What it can do, is deflect attention for someone who has low self-esteem issues.

This can be “feeling” like a failure or a fraud, that they’ll be exposed at any moment.

Oh The Irony

You feel proud about yourself, what you’ve accomplished in your life and career, you enjoy good health, you look and dress well.

How many more people would like you for who your truly are, if you projected this persona at all times.

But you subconsciously shoot your success down, you punish yourself, thinking you’re not good enough.

You think your superiors, friends or family members won’t like you as much, if you show your true self. You become vulnerable to criticism.

Someone for instance, suggests you need to improve on working on your assertiveness. What you interpret instead, is you’re an inadequate person.

These are the thoughts and the beliefs, of those who lack self-esteem. Although they’ve achieved plenty, it’s still not good enough.

Just Love Yourself More

What you rarely feel is proud of your accomplishments, as you think you’re not competent or capable enough.

You feel you don’t deserve all you’ve earned. As a result, you have a problem accepting yourself.

You secretly feel like a phony. Yet all you want, is to be recognized for the things you worked hard for, and not for the things that were handed to you.

To Increase Self-Esteem

Begin by discovering and then writing down the things you’re proud of. Many become surprised at what they come up with.

You’re an excellent executive, who also makes a delicious gourmet lasagna. Acknowledge to yourself, all the good things you feel good about.

Make a list of things you’re proud of and why. For some, it can be as simple as overcoming some type of difficulty, such as a major illness.

Realize the dedication and the diligence that was needed, to accomplish these things.

The biggest issue with these accomplishments however, is you’re embarrassed it makes you feel good. You’re then further embarrassed, once you realize something so simple, builds your self-esteem.

Just Be Proud Of What You’ve Done

Once you know which accomplishments makes you feel better, note down what they are.

Whenever you feel down on yourself, once your confidence wavers, you’ll then have a reference point of all the things that makes you feel better.

Ask yourself, if you have the capability to brag a little about some of your greatest accomplishments. Injecting a bit of humor always helps.

Offer what you’re proud of, in ways which shows others without having to actually tell them, such as photographs.

Be More Proud Of Yourself

What some don’t understand, is why an individual who has been so successful, lacks self confidence.

Why they don’t feel better about their accomplishments. Instead, what they do is mask it, by being arrogant.

They never talk about themselves, because they feel incompetent or embarrassed, then wonder why they get no respect.

So relax and become more open. What this can create is a mutual bond, where you can share your “wins.”

Also when doing so, always show your gratitude, and thank everyone.