The relationships we build in our lives are the biggest influences when it comes to our personal growth. Everything develops from building quality friendships. When we were young, it was the bonding process with our parents that was our first relationship.
This is where our personal growth began, and how we began to understand the value of mutual connections.
This initial growth, what it did was helped us to make our various life choices we’ve made, based on how we handled the relationship.
What it comes down to is how our self-esteem, influences the current relationships we have.
What’s important when building relationships, is how we’re able to manage our internal fears and selflessness.
The emotion of fear has been defined in a variety of ways and cases, and has a confounding effect when it comes to the existence of our relationships.
The Fear Of
The greatest fear when it comes to relationships is the fear of commitment. This fear can strike anyone and is a residue from our past experiences.
If we happened to of had several damaging relationships in the past, then we put our guard up and shelter ourselves with fear.
The question is why do we need to carry around this type of fear to protect ourselves.
It’s usually because we don’t know any better or we’re afraid of being hurt, which prevents us from opening up to others.
The fear of our partner can be just as tough as the fear of ourselves.
We can wonder how we allowed ourselves to get caught, get stuck in that relationship for such a long time.
What was the turning point that created this fear, and allowed it to fester to this point.
When wondering, don’t disqualify any answer since that’s what we’ll first instinctively do.
To Trust Yourself
Our initial intuition is always the last thing we trust. So just learn to listen and trust what the inner voice says.
This especially with the initial instincts that comes to mind. How one way fear can be resolved, is by building up your own confidence.
Where fear lies is how you grew up, the type of environment. What needs to be looked at is the level of your self-esteem.
At times, we weren’t always treated fairly as children, so we suffer the consequences as a result.
To Build Yourself Up
To overcome this, as painful as it may be, you need to go back and introspect into your childhood, and pinpoint the age and event or events when you think the problems began to occur.
Witness it as if you were seeing it for the first time, as if a movie of your life is playing right in front of you.
Write down everything you see, and then begin listening to how you relate to these experiences. Is there a common pattern that’s developing.
You should begin to see something that’s reoccurring over and over again, in how you treat and experience your current friendships.
You’ll realize those same patterns are still there, as if it was the first time it happened, they remain extremely vivid.
What then happens, is you’ll begin to identify these same patterns repeating themselves, over and over again.
Identifying Your Repair Point
You’ll then know exactly where to begin, because you’ve identified the point in your life that needs to be fixed.
Often, you’ll say, “I can’t find that point.” If this is the case, then go over what you wrote and identify a pattern.
Reviewing what you wrote will help you identify where the same roadblocks occur.
Keep in mind it’s more difficult to see the negative attitudes of your life, and that’s what usually needs to change.
If you’ve matured to the point you can master and control your emotions and attitude, then you’re almost guaranteed the majority of your issues will be solved.
To Heal Is To Know Yourself
To start the healing process, there’s no cure or remedy that’s possible until the root of the problem is known.
These aren’t the symptoms or issues you’re experiencing today, but the ones dormant in your past, or very little will change.
New problems in your current life will surface, because the initial issues haven’t been resolved.
It doesn’t matter why the event originally happened, but what’s important is you acknowledge them and then accept the circumstances.
So forgive yourself and the incidents that happened, bless them, and just let them go.
Then you’re closer to changing your life for the positive, from that point on, releasing your fears.
Often, this process can be extremely difficult and painful to go through, and why you’ve avoided it.
Your previous life experiences, along with your energy level might waver, but as long as you remain conscious of what’s happening, you’ll be fine.
To Identify And Resolve
It doesn’t need to be a long extended process, but what’s important is you’ll be fully immersed and involved.
It’s your life, and they’re your own personal experiences and responsibilities. Without going through this process, you’ll just run around in circles.
As you witness and handle the initial stages of the problem, all of the symptoms and hurdles will begin to dissipate without you even realizing it.
The reason for this is because they’re no longer important to you. Your mind, heart and soul has accepted the change.
The worst emotion you can endure is living in fear, living in the shadows, especially if in the presence of your partner. This until the deep rooted issues are resolved.