The Secret To Getting What You Want Is To Simply Ask For It

how to overcome rejectionWhat the majority of people are afraid to do is ask for whatever it is they want. They’re either too proud or too embarrassed, so they expect others to just give it to them. They feel that they deserve it, or their ego prevents them from asking, that it should be just handed to them on a platter.

It’s human nature to not ask for what you want, the biggest single culprit being rejection. We’re afraid to close that sale, ask someone to buy something, ask someone out on a date, because we don’t want to hear “No.”

The fear of a simple “No” can be devastating, it looms large. Getting rejected is one of the biggest blows on our self-esteem. Rejection is an unbelievable feeling which separates us from what we want and what we deserve in life.

Once you experience rejection, at times, you likely won’t ever ask again. We’ve all felt this unpleasant sensitivity at one time or another. Asking someone something and getting a flat out rejection, is devastatingly painful.

The Fear Of Rejection
So why is it that rejection so powerful, why does it take such a stranglehold on our livelihood. Why is it so difficult to overcome this feeling once we hear just two simple letters “No.”

Similar to rejection, anything that’s negative is equally as powerful. There could be 150 people wishing you a “Happy Birthday” on Facebook, or telling you how great you look.

But if there’s just one person that tells you otherwise, someone that says “There’s too many candles and not enough cake,” instead of wishing you a happy birthday, or that you look like crap, those 150 positive messages doesn’t mean a thing.


To Be Accepted
On every level, what everyone wants to do is just fit in, to be accepted by their peer group, to be part of the tribe. The reason why we fixate on rejection is because of that feeling of alienation from that group.

Think back when you did something out of your comfort zone. You felt hesitant, going through scenarios of rejection in your mind, thinking of the worse possible outcome. So you delayed while you built up the courage.

Just Begin “Asking”
To be successful in life and business, you need to build up the strength to ask. Don’t be afraid to ask for things that most would dare to ask for, and then expect a “No.” Build up the courage to work hard to get what you want, become passionate about it, and then all the no’s won’t matter.

Whenever you hear a success story, that someone’s the top salesman in their company, what they don’t tell you is how hard they worked to get there. How many “no’s” that they’ve encountered, how many times they were rejected to get just that one sale. All that others say is how lucky that person is.

Knocking on doors, making all those phone calls, asking for the sale, knowing how to close, is beyond being afraid, but accepting and embracing rejection, expecting that no, because they know that they’re one step closer to a yes.

The biggest fear however, is rejection. To overcome this fear is to believe in yourself, to never take it personally because it never is. Just believe in yourself and what you’re asking for. If you don’t believe, then you’ll never overcome your fear.

Everyone Wants To Succeed
Everyone wants to get better, to make more money, become successful, but most are scared to put in the hard work for it to happen. Most will automatically get discouraged once someone says no.

It sets off a trigger, a spiral downwards, they begin thinking that their plan or idea won’t work, this because of receiving negative criticism. What’s needed is belief that this rejection won’t dissuade you.

All You Need To Do Is Ask
There is one caveat however when you do ask, and that’s to “ask” with conviction, to place all of your confidence, creativity, and effort into it, to make it believable.

When it comes to selling something, especially online, your product or service most likely has competition. Someone most likely already asked them to buy, so that should give you enough validation to ask as well.


The only difference being that you should find more creative and unique ways of asking. Package it so you’ll stand out distinct from the crowd.

Relationships Need Authority
Whenever it comes to relationships, what’s key is confidence without being cocky. No one doesn’t want to be associated with, or date someone who’s got zero confidence.

Similar to asking, the more confidence that you have, the more that you practice, the better results you’ll get. No one suddenly becomes confident overnight. You need to work at it while not giving up the first time that you’re rejected.

What we all have is dreams. But in order for these dreams to come true, what it takes is a lot of dedication, determination, effort, and self-discipline.

It All Comes Down To Effort
Effort is the key to success. Anyone who’s successful has put in an incredible amount of effort to generate their results. The more that you ask, alter it to get it right, the better that you’ll get at it.

The better that you get at asking for something, the more that you refine it, the more “Yeses” you’ll get.

It’s human nature that once you hear “no,” you feel rejected, there will always be negativity. But if you really want to get what you’re asking for, you should never give up the first time there’s adversity.

Once you feel hesitant or dejected, always remember that you’ll never get what you want if you don’t ask for it. “You can’t always get what you want, but if you ask sometime…”

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